Walk on.

Waking Up

2011-11-15T09:02:00.000-08:00

When I came home a few months back, I didn’t expect a lot of things to be the same. I didn’t expect zero changes towards the places I left for so long. I didn’t expect too much. I anticipate. Camouflage on.

When I left the place to come home I didn’t want the reminiscences to be left scarce. I didn’t want anything to be deserted. Or isolated. I’d cry. Camouflage on. And off.

My heart glitters for the smallest things, why the big wave?

Do you think the sun won't shine this time?

Are you breathing only half of the air?

Are you giving only half a chance?

Wake up, the sun has been up for ages.

It's not the big things BUT the little things that can mean enough.

2011-05-21T13:42:00.000-07:00

Graduation week passed by in a blink of an eye, like literally.

One minute it was the finals, then driving off to JFK to fetch my parents, suddenly we're at Niagara Falls, NY and went "Corelle's" at Corning, graduation commencement the next morning at Penn State, a trip down the memory lane at Philly for both my parents, hours of shopping at the Premium Outlet, the loading and unloading of boxes for contenna shipping. The next thing I realized, both of them had arrived safely back home in Malaysia leaving me less than two weeks to follow.

When I saw my mum at the airport for the first time after two years, I just went up to her and asked where dad is. We hugged and kissed, you know how you're supposed to have this sense of ecstatic and overjoyed for someone you haven't seen for two years. I was downright happy but, prolly cause we've been in touch almost everyday for the past few months planning on our trip that it felt as if I see her everyday. Ah, the power of Internet, Skype, Facebook, Google Spreadsheet, you name it. Nevertheless, it felt really great seeing them again. Terima kasih Ibu dan Ayah for coming, really appreciated it a lot :)

Now that I've graduated, a lot of things come to mind. Like should I continue with Grad School or start working..or...just living it heh.

Over the past years so many things happened, so many emotions involved, so many...places touched.
I know I'm going to really miss college and friends that have been synonymously associated with my life for the last five years or so. I'll miss for all the rights things in the world, cause it's not the big things BUT the little things that can mean enough.

He is there..

2011-03-30T21:56:00.000-07:00

...And somewhere tonight
Far away and out of sight
There's a child that's too weak to cry
Look deep in those eyes
Can't you see Him in disguise?

Waves to Celcius

2011-02-10T20:01:00.000-08:00

Remember how we use to eat ice cream without even thinking how or whether it would fall out of our hands and ruin our shirt? Or the time when we would just play with anyone we meet no matter how they look like as long as they're nice? That time when hate and prejudice had not even existed.

So..after a while, I feel like writing again :)

Florida was fun last winter, but our journey to the West was even lovelier, turned out better than I had anticipated it. Met old friends, meet new friends. We actually managed to cover a lot of places in twelve days, kudos to all of us for maintaining our awesomeness throughout the trip. I sorta wished the others could have joined too. The thing about living away from home is that, friends are all we have, and turn to for whatever reasons. We all love our families yeah, but aren't friends family too?
I reckon :)

overrated hollywood, LA - us gals!

If I were to pick an award for the best moment award, I'd say watching Bellagio fountain show in Las Vegas where they had Time to Say Goodbye played. Oh my, too beautiful. I'm sure they have it on youtube somewhere..and also that morning at Big Sur, the wind was tooooo awesome to be ignored. Yeah, I can't choose, they both deserve equally.

And so spring began and we're officially one semester away from being Penn State alumni. These past few weeks have been crazy. The weather, after graduation plan, the cold weather, hati, piano, Egypt, the cold weather+the wind, dramas, skiing, online shopping? lol. Not so much on the classes though. alhamdulillah. though the exams have started, and will continue for the rest of the semester...

Regarding being the TA for BIOTC 479 - Methods in Bio fermentations - not bad, not bad at all, I've always loved the class and it helps that Bea's an awesome instructor, she's just plain cool.

It's -12 degree Celcius al-aaan and I wish for a lot of things right now, like.....and.....and also.....but most of all.......... Haha, go figure.

Oh the 90's!

2010-12-05T09:34:00.000-08:00

I woke this morning and had the strangest pleasant dream ever. So strange I had to pinch myself a couple of times to make sure that I was really awake. So sad really, sort of wished it was real.

As good as things are today, I reckon they can never beat the old stuff. Oh, those wondrous years of being a kid... aww man, I miss the 90s. period.

I'd have to say though, just because you were born in '97 doesn't mean you're a 90s kid. It's not like you could remember the original Simpsons. I am sorry but three conscious years of the 90s just won’t cut it.

You're a 90s kid if:

You can finish this [Ice Ice____ ]

You remember watching:

- Hey Arnold

- The Bugs Bunny Show

- Ren & Stimpy

- Pinky and the Brain

- AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!

- Rocko's Modern Life.

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!" You remember:

- Playschool with Monica

- Step by Step

- Family Matters

- Dinosaurs

- Boy Meets World

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons. You remember reading "Goosebumps". And "Animorphs". And Sailormoons to top that, Australia had it running at 9 am every Saturday. Yes, I remember that much.

Paul Jennings and Andy Griffiths were the funniest authors of all time.

And you thought R.L Stine was actually immortal.

You watched Round the Twist! ans The Spellbinder.

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You said "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not

When everything was settled by:

- Rock, Scissors, Paper

- Dip dip...

- There's a party by the pool, would you like to come?

- Eeny, meeny, miny, mo!

When Cops & Robbers was a daily activity. When we played Tiggy, Safe, 40/40 and Hide & Seek until our legs grew numb.

Stuck in the mud.

"Turn around, touch the ground, im not in!"

Skipping ropes! Hopscotch! Clapping games! "My boyfriend gave me an apple.."

You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.

Tazos owned chip packets.

Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together. Duh.

You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.

You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.

You remember those Where's Wally books.

You remember eating Warheads.

You remember Push Pops and Lucky Dips. And YoGo gorilla... and the original Cocoa Pops monkey: "It's just like a chocolate milkshake - only crunchy!"

Home-made birthday cards were cool, especially the ones where you'd cut a mouth into it so that it opened up and a tongue popped out. Making those little paper fortune things, and then predicting your life with them.

Tamagotchis had to be banned in school because of their popularity.

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.

Juice boxes where only 80cents.

"Emo" didn't exist.

And Windows 95 was the best.

You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.

And that Jumanji was real.

You knew Michael Jordan was the best all-time basketballer who played for the Chicago Bulls, even though we don't follow NBA basketball.

Barbie & Ken by Mattel owned the shelves.

World 4 Kids, before Toys R Us.

Playdough was the coolest stuff invented.

Collecting Stamps was cool

You understand when I say "Cheez TV".

You collected all the Troll dolls.

If you even know what a walkman is.

The original Pokemon with Ash, Misty and Brock.

Before those try-hards at the Yu-Gi-Oh production plant.

You've gotten creped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

Good times, good times... :)

Opah Saya Seorang Guru

2010-07-09T19:47:00.000-07:00

Opah saya seorang guru

Pada zaman hijaunya..

Zaman opah bawak balik buku-buku kosong untuk diconteng. Dan pensil warna banyak-banyak untuk digunakan sesuka hati….terase dunia indah masa tu.

Zaman bila balik kampung je, mesti opah nyanyi lagu: “Papaku pulang dari kota, papaku belikan kereta, kereta kecil warna merah, boleh ku bawa ke sekolah. Pon pon ponponpon ponpon ponpon…….” Pastu made us all nyanyi kuat-kuat, guru BM lah katakan

Zaman bile balik kampung, mesti ikut opah pergi market once in a while.. Pastu hafal nama-nama ikan dan sayur kat market tu, sampai taukeh2 cina kat situ pon dah cam muka..

Zaman bile raya sahaje, mesti excited. Sebab opah mesti kasik duit banyak. Cucu sulunglah katakan… Sekali-sakala, after subuh opah mesti ajak mengaji sekali bersama tokaji.

Zaman tu terasa opah sangat anggun.

Opah saya seorang guru

Belasan tahun yg lepas..

Walau sering sakit-sakit, opah tetap maintain anggun and disiplin. Dah kata guru.. Oh, did I mention Opah was a PE teacher too?

Setiap kali bertemu atau on the phone, mesti opah greet dengan “hai cucundaa tercintaaaaa, boipren sehaattt…”

Opah saya sangat garang but gradually turns soft as she ages. Being the former and the latter, opah tak pernah lupa teluskan butiran mutiara kata. Itulah opah. Selamanya.

Opah saya kini tiada. Expected BUT not so soon..

Tak dapat nak mandikan opah sekali lagi. Ingatkan dapat jumpa balik opah after graduation.. Tak sempatlah opah nak rasa nasi minyak yg dijanji.

Takpelahh. Sedihnya orang, sedih lagi Tok Aji.

Till we meet again. Sayang opah. Al-fatihah.

Hamidah Yeop. 27 June 2010

Guru O Guru

2010-05-16T15:17:00.000-07:00

Dialah pemberi paling setia
Tiap akar ilmu miliknya
Pelita dan lampu segala
Untuk manusia sebelum jadi dewasa.

Dialah ibu dialah bapa juga sahabat
Alur kesetiaan mengalirkan nasihat
Pemimpin yang ditauliahkan segala umat
Seribu tahun katanya menjadi hikmat.

Jika hari ini seorang Perdana Menteri berkuasa
Jika hari ini seorang Raja menaiki takhta
Jika hari ini seorang Presiden sebuah negara
Jika hari ini seorang ulama yang mulia
Jika hari ini seorang peguam menang bicara
Jika hari ini seorang penulis terkemuka
Jika hari ini siapa sahaja menjadi dewasa;
Sejarahnya dimulakan oleh seorang guru biasa
Dengan lembut sabarnya mengajar tulis-baca.

Di mana-mana dia berdiri di muka muridnya
Di sebuah sekolah mewah di Ibu Kota
Di bangunan tua sekolah Hulu Terengganu
Dia adalah guru mewakili seribu buku;
Semakin terpencil duduknya di ceruk desa
Semakin bererti tugasnya kepada negara.
Jadilah apa pun pada akhir kehidupanmu, guruku
Budi yang diapungkan di dulangi ilmu
Panggilan keramat "cikgu" kekal terpahat
Menjadi kenangan ke akhir hayat.

USMAN AWANG
1979

(Dedikasi kepada Guru-guru tersayang, Selamat Hari Guru Cikgu, Sir, Teacher, Ustaz, Ustazah, Opah, Ibu dan Ayah :)

Blooduhh.

2010-03-01T19:00:00.000-08:00

It’s the week before spring’s break again. Though it’s less anticipated (now with the exams coming up -and im not talking about one or two or even three exams, and assignments oooh they’re just plain ridiculous, don't even want to talk about it. Still, the fact that I’m spending some time writing this down just proves that THERE IS STILL TIME for whatever reason I should be spending it on. IBU’s birthday passed on the 17^th February. Even with the calling and writing on facebook wall were just not enough. I miss my mum, and her awesome cooking :(

I called my best friend this morning-approaching-afternoon over something that is sort of ridiculous (partly since I’ve never really called anyone just to say I flunked a not so important exam *inserts sarcasm here*) and the best part was we only talked about it for like 10 minutes and went on babbling about other stuff for an hour. And I’m writing it down here too, wow, why isn’t that a surprise. If I had my way of channeling this negative emotion and inner rage, it would stink really really bad. Anyways, the marks weren't what really put me off, believe me. I’m wayyyy over that. It’s just that I reckon I’ve spent a CONSIDERABLY, most probably the only subject I had spent time and HEART into studying it. I really liked the subject (which DOESN'T come often, especially in the biotech field) and that the fact that my marks were off because x jawab the way she wanted it to be was practically busuk. I mean, the answers are all there for virus sake.

:::::::::

BUT she rocked the class nevertheless. I just hated the BLOODY marks. boo-hoo.

Get your own valid XHTML YouTube embed code

Okay, I'm over it now ^^

Beautiful Relapse

2009-10-31T17:02:00.000-07:00

Had this song played over for a while. Beautiful and deep.

I used to get head over heels for (some) his songs when I was 14. They felt true. I felt Then.

After almost half a decade on hiatus, Em's back with his sixth studio album Relapse. Still as dirty as previous albums (yeah he curses a lot and all those you-wouldn't-want-kids-to-hear words are blended all over the lyrics like cookies and cream in ice cream?) Funny though his songs are full of hate, mind-twisted, anger and personal demons, I reckon he channeled em well. At least he's honest and not afraid to tell (unlike some ppl ik). and he's brilliant in words. I prefer songs like Mockingbird, Cleaning Out My Closet, Sing For the Moment, Stan, Toy Soldiers and Beautiful (just to name few) over ughh, Superman, and such. Though I did listen to Without Me and the Real Slim Shady (I had my dad hear it, his head was shakin to the beat a little, I figured it was alright then, idk lol) and of course I had preferred the clean version, I don't like this cursing shit.

A no-no.

I don't really blame Em for the dark and dirtiness; reflected how painful and fished in his life was. When I first heard his songs, the content both horrified and intrigued my young mind. It was nothing else like hip hop I knew, blame Too Phat or Teh Tarik Crew. His dark and gloo-mah side just proves how seriously wrong something is up there (points to the head). And I hate most of the music videos. They're too much, at least for me.

And I thought X Japan was too much. Guess both are. Heh.

On the plus side, this song is so deep and beautiful, so the title says.

Asyraf, Malaysia dan Junior Year

2009-09-26T10:48:00.001-07:00

Last two Wednesdays was my (only) brother's 17th birthday. I didn't get a chance to write it about it since things were pretty much occupied last week, it still is now, heh. I have 4 exams coming up, a quiz and 2 homeworks, all of which are due/held next week.

And I've already had an exam last week. and, and it's only the fourth week of class. haishh.

I guess Junior year is fairly....tight. so they say.

Anyways, Muhammad Asyraf was born on September 16, 1992. That day, 46 years ago, Malaysia was formed and that day also marked hari ulang tahun Angkatan Tentera Malaysia (ATM) yang ke-76. Mungkin ramai yang tidak sedar akan hari bersejarah ini since tiada cuti umum pada hari ini di Malaysia sebagaimana kita bercuti untuk menyambut Hari Kemerdekaan pada setiap 31 Ogos. Mungkin juga ramai di Semenanjung Tanah Melayu tidak sedar betapa bermaknanya hari ini. Bagi kebanyakan rakyat di Sabah and Sarawak though, this date means a lot because two Wednesdays ago, genaplah 46 tahun Sabah dan Sarawak merdeka melalui penubuhan Malaysia.

So, being the only son/brother to our family, Asyraf bears a trait like no other.

His words are those of trust and honesty

His actions are of which you can't argue

His strength are somewhat descends of Badang

His craze for anime are infectious, not for MU though, heh

His jokes are sometimes laughable and at times downright hilarious

His detests and affection are to anyone regardless

His respect for elders are beyond the capacity of wajibalghunnah

...and his temper sebijik macam ayah :P

Asyraf and our cousins celebrating birthdays together

So yeah, mestilah sayang Asyraf.

I missed his piggyback rides, our anime talks, his brags about MU, and the chocolates & letters he always gets, his words :)

So, Happy Belated Birthday dear and (hope it's not too late to wish) Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir Batin semua.

"Ayam rendang dodol dan lemang,

ketupat pulut ketupat palas,

raya pertama perut dah kenyang,

Puasa Enam janganlah malas."

Petir dan Pelangi

2009-09-18T20:50:00.000-07:00

"Kadang2 Allah sembunyikan matahari,
Dia datangkan kita petir dan kilat,
Kita bertanya2 kemana hilang nya matahari?
Rupa2nya Allah memberi kita pelangi..."

...alhamdulillah :)

Najihah dan Merdeka

2009-08-31T13:51:00.000-07:00

Hari ini hari ulang tahun adik saya Najihah yang ke 15. My parents named her after our queen Tuanku Najihah binti Tunku Besar Burhanuddin who was the Permaisuri Agong at that time. My other sister Amirah had her sweet 18 last 3rd of August, (not so long ago eh)
Anyways, Najihah is really one of a kind, - for a sister that is.
She is,
the kind of person you'd wanna get girly and giddy all over with lol.
the kind who you can be uncool with and not be ashamed of it
the kind where you can tell each other dumb jokes and laugh nevertheless
the kind where you can share J and K stuff with :P
and the best part is,
the kind of sister who you can boss around the house and not be guilty about it, jk.

Of course Najihah has her days of tantrums, but I can handle em :P

Happy Birthday luv,
and Salaam Merdeka to alllll :D

What the Wind Will Protect

2009-08-09T11:12:00.000-07:00

It wasn't a remorse
neither was it a course
funny how it just passes
funny it is, still it masses
always there
always uncalled for
always uncured for
always...there
for when it's gone it reappears
sometimes there's a gang of them
it totally asperses
for it's a cause?
a retribution may hap,

...so the wind says.
i would know.

facing the wind while it passes
that it does nay it masses
though uncalled for
though uncured for

always it i wish,
what the wind will protect.

dil, 0222 monday

Sayang AYAH :)

2009-06-21T07:36:00.000-07:00

Today's Father's Day. heh.

I planned on sending him off to work and wished him early in the morning. Camane bole tertido balik after Subuh I dunno :P

Anyways, called him at work a little later during the day and wished him.
(sorry Yah x call awal2, too caught up with stuff, hehe)
So...ayah, like any other working dad, is always very very busy, zutto..day and night.
I should say, he's really the best male person I know so far.
He's to me, someone I can turn to at any time, best friend, worst enemy, THE dad... lalala~
tengok bola skali, layan same kinda movies, music that we can totally relate (some :) and I can practically talk about almost everything to him,
and I really really cherished that.
One thing I love most about ayah is that, he knows how to make my heart feel warm and giddy all over even though I was practically bawling an hour before. lol.
Sometimes ayah would make ridiculous jokes and expect us siblings to laugh at them. He would say stuff like, 'Masa ayah kecik dulu......' and goes on and on about his childhood difficulties and the memories he had as a kampung boy. Ayah really was a strong boy back then, and though I never said this to him, I really am proud to be his daughter. *mushy stuff here*
Sometimes, ayah can be a real stone, xde perasaan. and sometimes macam kanak2 riang, hehee
The only flaw I guess, ayah x reti pujuk org..heh. and that temper OMG boleh membunuh jiwa raga lol. but that was ages ago. Susah nak tgk ayah marah sekarang :))
Ayah's 43 years old now, same as Ibu, only a month older.

ayah and his ayam depan rumah

..earlier years in Taylor's College (guess which one is he ;)

Happy Father's Day, Sayang Ayah!

Blind

2009-06-14T07:57:00.001-07:00

arms are not wings....

.....wings are not arms

Would it kill to understand?

Barcelona and Birthday

2009-05-27T19:10:00.001-07:00

So Barcelona won. We all knew that was coming :)

Also, today is my beeeeessstt buddy's birthday. Hee~
He's exactly one month younger than me. Da besar ye adik akak :P

at 08:21 am
*telephone ringing*

Him: *croaking* uh, hello?
Me: *giggling* heee~ heyyy!
Him: Uh?
Me: Happy Birthday!
Him: Uh, thanks..
Me: *giggling again* tgh tido ke?
Him: Uh, uhuh.. *$#@%^@!* won
Me: ....... Barcelona menang, mesti ko happy kan?
Him: !@#$%&**$
Me: *gigling even louder* eyt, pegi la tido balik
Him: Uh, I'm kinda tired..
Me: I figure..Dah2 gi tido balik..
Him: &&%$@%%&*^^
Me: Huh?
Him: You know who won kan?
Me: ........
Me: LOL adeyy
Him: Uh, nape ko gelak? Happy sgt eh..
Me: ROFL. gi tidolah!
Him: Uh, I'm kinda tired.
Me: You said that already.
Him: Uh, *@%$%%^&* thanks for the wish.
Me: No problem.
Him: Dil,
Me: Yea
Him: Man U kalah.
Me: .........
Him: I think I'm going back to bed.
Me: U do that. Da mamai sgt nih.
Him: *croaking even worse*
Me: heheheheh
Him: Thanks again for the wish..
Me: Haha. No problem.
Him: Okeh.
Me: Okeh.

*conversation ends*

Of Pardoned.

2009-05-27T17:33:00.000-07:00

A lot of things on my mind lately..my sick grandma, rumah, college, umrah, passport thingy..(uggh!)
...and death.
A friend of mine passed away the other day. I may not be of close acquaintance with him but he was, a friend, a great one too. I don't really have a lot of memories with him except the one time we had lunch together at Big Bowl. Nadia and Nana were there too. To be honest, that was actually the first time I've gotten the chance to know and talk to him. Sembang about stuff. heh. I don't know a lot of freshmen boys being a sophomore myself. It's not that I don't socialize with ppl or not being friendly, it's just.. I'm not really um, the kind of person who would go up to strangers and start messing around with their business (if u know what I mean)
But. Bulan was definitely one of the people that I've been blessed to know with. Yeah, we call him Bulan. That guy. Comel kan?
and no one knew it coming.
I remembered my housemates and I asking for his and Izmers' (another freshman) help moving the boxes and our stuff into the store room that weekend since our flights are earlier than them. plus, they were staying next door.

Nana: Nanti kitorg masak sedap sedap next sem.
Them: Wokeyh!

I felt bad. They were A LOT of boxes and our stuff. So, we decided to give out $10 each. hehe. Okla tuh. Asya and Nana were the first to leave the house leaving me and Boo. I felt baad again.

Me: Korg nak bihun x? (one day I went out and saw them at the elevator)
Them: NAK!
Me: Okeh. Esok eh.
Them: Masak sedap2 taw..
Me: Haha. Okeh. Byee.

That night when me and Boo were leaving for our flight the next morning with Mizah, Shafar and Megat, Bulan practically brought down all of my bags. ALL OF THEM. The only thing I had to hold was my purse.

Me: Eh xpe ke ni? (When we going down) Susah2 je. Nanti nak bawak kotak-kotaknye lagi. haha.
Bulan: Haha. Xpe2. Bile lagi...

Bile lagi...

I've only gotten know him for a while and feel this. I can imagine how his family and close friends are feeling then. My deepest condolences for them.

We all loved him.
tapi Allah lagi sayang Bulan..

DaripadaNya kita datang dan kepadaNya kita kembali. Al-Fatihah buat Al-Marhum.
Nublan Hadi Norzaki.

Not Much.

2009-04-10T18:34:00.000-07:00

Just spent the last freaking hours watching CSI (missed a lot of the episodes from last season, studying, yadaa yadaa). God, why the hell did Grissom quit? and really, (like that's the best way to end a character) my freaking Warrick had to die?? Yes I'm emotional. Don't blame me. It's not me talking. It's THE heart. I'm just another CSI go-er.
Shocked. New casts I don't mind but whyyyy did he have to die. Owh. If they take Nick and Brass out too, I'm sooo done watching the show.

NOT.
lol. jk.

...and I heard that Catherine's gonna die too.
ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!

Geez. end the show then will ya.

ps: I don't write much. I know XD

Pleasant.

2009-02-18T14:21:00.000-08:00

was browsing through ipod and found this dated back the second day of pre-muktamar:

Today, we all bgerak from vendetbilt uni around 230am in d morning. Very excited.heh. Kamil took his turn to be our driver that morning. And he n Qayyun talked about religious stuff along the way.
We had Subuh kat masjid at alabama. A very decent place. Ooo before that, we all stop kat gas station utk isi perut. I didn't buy anything though. Xde perasaan. Heh. Except m&ms n halls. double heh. Arrived at masjid at 700 am.
After subuh, the guys wanted to take pictures :)) n then we were on our way once again.. Qayyun drove the car.
I fell asleep halfway thru the ride. Qayyun n Kamil were hvg heavy talk again. Veryyy interesting. I dunno about the others but I had a great time hearing them talk about religious matters to politics n global economic. Good stuff there.
Stopped at a gas station before continuing the journey. Thank god there's a Subway. Yeayy! Me n Yat bought a foot long Italian tuna each for brunch n dinner. So did the other 2 gals n the drivers.
Kamil then took over until we reached New Orleans. We went through across the beautiful bridge. Jo's car was ahead of us. Together we went to find Masjid Alhameed only to find out that the place didn't exist anymore. MasyaAllah..
We stopped at a park (sorta) near a sea n had our prayer there. By then byk kete da sampai n kitrg lepak jap. Borak. Took photographs, we had a great time ;))
Qayyun took the drive to our last denstination. By now we were all comfortable talking to each other (aww, I'm gonna miss us) Stopped at a gas station for a refill at Lousiana. The last part of the journey was reminiscing. The men ( yes, I consider them real men) talked about insurances, war n sth about china conquering the world economy one day. Bai n the other me (Deela LOL) were dead asleep almost all the time. N I'm so jelous of that. Yeah, baad...Dil ;P

Trivia:
The only time the radio was turned on was when we were 5 mins away from stopping at vendy uni. The rest of the time the car was filled with Quran and hadith recitations, n surprisingly there was no burden in having to hear it. LOVEd the atmosphere..
Me, Yat, Bai n Deela took our turns having the back seats.
I don't even know if i spelled his name correct; Qayyun, Qayyum.lol
Boo's car was never around with the rest of the us lot.
I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN the DRIVING LICENSE!
so much for being a US citizen.heh.

Sent from my iPod

Whoah~ I must've been really excited back then.lol.

Outlandish

2009-01-21T20:36:00.000-08:00

Aicha by Outlandish
SUPER nice song :))

Random Thoughts:

*work overload is not, i repeat, IS NOT troublesome.
*smile.smile.smile.
*ecoute moi is in french meaning 'listen to me'
*forgive but don't forget.
*this vid won #1 in Germany 2003 (i told you this is random XD)
*hmmm
*why does it only takes a sec to distract you from the most important thing in the world?
*kidding doesn't mean that it's a joke.
*yang haq itu haq.yang batil itu batil.period.
*....
*it's -8 degree Celsius now.
*ngantuk.

Muktamar, Road Trip and the New Semester

2009-01-15T15:22:00.000-08:00

The road trip was phenomenal. We actually crossed 12 states in 2 weeks which is really awesome. and I enjoyed every single bit of it :)
The journey to Muktamar in Houston, Texas took around 2 days from State College, Pennsylvania. We only stopped to fill in the gas and pray. They were 6 cars and we split into 3 groups, easier. Stopped at Vanderbilt University in Tennessee for 6 hours before continuing the journey.

When we got there it was heaven. Muktamar has always been a one week grand event. grand event is usually held at grand places which in this case, Hilton Hotel. lol. I'm exagerating but what the heck.

The post muktamar activities were great, my only regret was I didn't get to play the laser tag. Girl's weren't arranged to play. Me, a girl. So I didn't play. Infinite blimey~
I am soooo gonna be in charge of the post-muktamar activities next year!
Other than that, it was cool. We went to NASA, Islamic Center (possibly the biggest in USA and was used to be a bank), met a lot of new people, met old friends, took lots of pictures, had fun :D

Then, there was the road trip.
We split up after the post muktamar. The seniors went to Florida, some of us went on a different route while others went back early. So, there left two cars. I get to drive at this point.heh.
So, us two cars went from Houston to Dallas and to San Antonio, Texas. San Antonio is beautiful in every aspect. The riverwalk is breathtaking.

Spring would've looked even lovelier in this.
Other places we visited was the historic Alamo and San Marcos, the 3rd most visited tourist attraction in Texas and was ranked the 3^rd Best Place to Shop in the world as seen on ABC's "The View", a true shoppers haven with over 130 luxury and popular American brand names. (though i didn't buy a thing.heh)

On our was back to Penn, we stopped at Atlanta, Georgia. This city I reckon, is really really gorgeous. And, it centers every place a tourist would wanna go visit. so that's cool. There's the Coca-Cola company*not much a fond now eh*, the largest Aquarium in the world, CNN Center, Centennial Olympic Park and its downtown.

After that, my car went back to State College a few hours earlier than the other car. The car was, after all rented, so we got rushed.

Days of driving was exhausting for us drivers, hell yeah. So bed was heaven when we arrived :P

The car also nearly got towed. Luckily, Macho saved it.heh.

Everything went back to normal then, well, almost everything.

This semester is... something. I'm practically taking all subjects that are all hardcore courses. 2 labs, 4 lectures and 1 web course. Wasn't planning to, but, had no other choices. Otherwise I'd be racing the time!
Anyways, the classes were all alright. but, the labs were scaaaaaaary. I mean, having gone 2 years of from doing labs really kicks the 'out-of-the-world-butterfly-in-stomach' hell out of me.

But,
yeah,
I got over it XD

P/S: Missed home terribly :'(

Pensil

2008-11-27T12:09:00.001-08:00

"Kalau orang buat jahat dengan kita, orang benci dengan kita, orang tak suka kita, kita sabar. Sebab kita ni siapa punya? Allah punya. Allah punya.

Kita jangan marah dia, jangan marah mak. Mak pukul, jangan marah mak, sayang mak. Orang buat kita, kita jangan marah dia, kita kena sayang.
Kita kena apa?

Cakap dengan Allah, Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, baikkan hati mak aku, baikkan hati orang-orang yang tak suka dengan aku. Cakap dengan Allah, nanti Allah bagi, ya. Ya.
Dah, jangan sedih-sedih."
- pesan Nenek kepada Badrul

A Land Called Paradise

2008-11-25T19:00:00.001-08:00

Thoughts for today :)

Wallahua'alam

credits: MAS Media Foundation, www.masmediafoundation.org

Random Thoughts during Thanksgiving

2008-11-25T17:39:00.001-08:00

So I stayed at home during Thanksgiving. BIG deal. Everyone has their own way of having fun. being fun. yeah. whatever.
Anyways, I've been 'lazying' these days, if 'lazying's even a word. lol.
[edited: I mean, lazing. yeah. got that word right. Gosh, I sounded dumb. blimey~]

The internet seems to work fine, no virus crashing. good thing nothing bad happened that Monday.

Okay, so everyday it's the same routine done over and over again, and since no food shopping during the break, food's getting diminished, might as well just fast. yeah, brilliant idea there. good thinking girl :)

.....Lately, I've been stalking every news on X's as I could possible have, downloading every live event they held or are currently have, crashing every website that has anything to do with them, lurking every clip they would be in Youtube. It's sick, I know. Can't help it, blame it on the internet. period.
Anywhow, guess the old flame suddenly decided to burn again. This time brighter. No kidding. Apparently, the band decide to reunite again after 10 years of hiatus. That is a looooong time ago. They were formed before I was even born for crying out loud. Despite all the dramas and loss of hide, they're back and to my delight, their fans have increased worldwide. The first concert at Tokyo Dome (where they had their last live) had to be held for 3 consecutive days to meet the demands for these fans who had waited a long time. Yeah, the disband wasn't planned, so people hadn't been properly bid farewell and so, the comeback was more than what they've been wanting. Yes, I now these much. Told u it's the internet's doings.

All the members haven't changed much, except:
1) Toshi can't seem to hit some of the high note these days. His voice cracked a bit. Can't blame the poor guy. 10 years of not using the high tone he used to during X days does change the course of the voice a little bit. He'll get better I reckon. Just have to get used to the singing again. Yep, defintely in no time :)
2) Heath' turning more visual kei.lol.he should've done that during those days XD
3) Yoshiki's music really is BEAUTIFUL rock+classical = epic. Here's a sample
4) Pata has been diggin me lately. His mannerism is one of a kind. That wave he does to thank the fans totally reflects his calm fatherly figure. and that hair, lol, totally American style XD
5) hide..sigh, bet he would have just smiled his way during every concert they would have
6) Toshi and Yoshiki are getting even more gay on stage. I tell ya, it's the age. plus, I KNOW they missed themselves so much.ROFL.
7) Pata's reaaalllyy famous in France
8) Yoshiki still acts like a drama queen. but, I like him :)
9) Heath spots a peacock kinda hair.lol.
10) Toshi and Yoshiki doesn't look aged at all. Really. Pata..well, I did say he has a fatherly figure and Heath can't possible look old with the hair lol.
11) hide on the other hand, is forever young :))

Yeah, that's my two cents alright.

Been trying to play the keyboard for the moment though I really NEED a piano for total endorsement.

Yeah.

Guess that's just about it.

::We Are X::

2008-11-14T22:51:00.000-08:00

The other day someone gave me some hardcore , indie rock songs to listen. There's one from Comeback Kid, Wax, Nightmare of You, Clou, HIM, I even got Pink Floyd and Ediie Grant's from my dad, if you call their songs 'rockish'.heh. Of all the songs given, I came to like Ignite's Bleeding.lol. No idea why I liked it.

Anyways, I was browsing through the folders in my computer, wanting to get rid of 'unwanted' files and found this under favourite band folder:

LOL. what was I liking? I'm soo not into these kind of concept now. Though they do remain as one of THE band which I really appreciate their music for. But those outfit? God. ROFL.

Still, don't get me wrong. X-Japan is one of the few rock bands in the world that can unquestionably referred to as legendary. Quite possibly among the last of the larger-than-life rock bands of the 20th century, X Japan practically inspired a whole new generation of Japanese musicians. The most credited as the ones who helped give rise to the visual kei movement in Japanese popular music with their unique use of makeup, multi-coloured gravity-defying hair, outlandish outfits, and dramatic stage antics combined with hard hitting rock and awe inspiring ballads.

Their style could be described as classical metal. They mix highly epic and moving orchestral music with pure heavy metal madness. Many of their songs are beautiful ballads while the other halves are heart racing rock anthems. The rest are a combination of both. Such duality in their music is the reason why even though they're a heavy metal band, they've achieved such widespread success in the mainstream. Still, no matter if the song is slow or fast, every song they play is a production of epic proportions. It's a style unlike heavy metal of the late 70's and early 80's which all of its members grew up listening to. So even when they started out, their music sounded a bit retro by North American standards, but still incredible music like this is timeless.

All of the members are great artists in their own right. There's the square-jawed vocalist Toshi (white shirt) who has a somewhat raspy yet harmonious voice. His voice perfectly fit those early heavy metal songs that made X famous.
The pink-haired guitarist hide (pronounced hee-day) who is the lead guitarist is a fan favorite with his fun-filled guitar playing skill and wicked sense of visual style. IMO, he is one of the greatest musical minds in the history of rock music.
Pata (curly long hair) the rhythmic guitarist is much less flamboyant than the others preferring a more standard American rock style but is nevertheless one of the greats and a match for hide's skill.
The bassist used to be Taiji who became one of the most revered bass players in Japan. His vision was very different than that of the band and his style was becoming increasingly reminiscent of American bands like Bon Jovi and Guns n' Roses. There came a point where Taiji did not agree with the direction X was heading at all and this eventually made him leave the band.
Heath (far left), the bassist who replaced him, is excellent, but he's not regarded as highly as Taiji was. But that was back in '92 and Heath had been with X for pretty long while. I really believe he had shown his mettle. Honestly, the bass of X Japan's music has always been rather tame, especially after Taiji. But I think that has more to do with the way most of the rock songs are written with lead guitars in mind and little consideration to bass.
Finally then there's the band leader Yoshiki, the mastermind behind most of their music. Yoshiki plays a dual role on drums and piano. He's also the main composer of the majority of X Japan songs. He's a man so androgynous and slender that you'd think he came straight out of a shoujo manga series. lol. He looks frail by his mannerisms and appearance, but can really go into a berserk rage on the drums and alternately play with quiet passion on piano. He's really melodramatic on stage which is an unusual match with hide's crazy flamboyance. There are very few artists I respect as much as Yoshiki and wouldn't hesitate to call him a genius. He can often be an egomaniac and though I don't agree with all of his career choices, I still have tremendous respect for him as an artist.

In all of the years they have been together, if you don't count their indie stuff, they've really only released four major albums. Apart from their time as X Japan, throughout the years the members would take frequent hiatuses and would concentrate on their own solo careers. The solo works are also very good which go to show an integral part each member plays within the band.

X was a very visual band, but as the years went by, their look gradually evolved into something more normal. Toshi and Yoshiki cut their hair, the guys would stop wearing makeup and opted for a more regular rock fashion style, such as sunglasses, leather pants and the like. Even though he didn't look as odd as he once did, hide is really the only one who kept a visual look going with his big pink (or red) hair and wild clothing. But I think the whole change is mostly a sign of maturation. Visual kei is fun for a while, but not everyone can keep it up for so many years without it getting tiresome.

Today, X-Japan’s doing a world tour (after 10 years of disbanding), without hide (They still use his playbacks in some of the performances though, makes it feel like hide's still with us). They’ve been around in and out for over 20 years and gave us awesome music to remember. Don’t think I’d like a band as much as them, well except DBSK lol.

To me, X's the definition of art.

Here's a clip of their last song performed from their last live in 1997, a very reminiscing one. I absolutely LOVE the crowd towards the end :) hide didn't want to play ballad until he heard this piece. So, the song means a lot to X. It's called Endless Rain.

.....and 11 years later, a recent performance by X- Japan at Hide's Live Memorial Summilt 2008. Originally a piece of music, Yoshiki composed this song in commemorate hide. He didn't want anyone else sings it or rather he felt no else could sing it the way it was supposed to , except Toshi. So, the song only then became complete with Toshi on vocals.They also showed X-Japan's old days as a background. Very lovely~

End Notes:

*Me, my dad and his brother used to ADORE these guys a lot during their golden days in the 90's and even occasionally nowadays.

*This band was the first to introduce me to rock music. So yeah, they mean a lot.

*hide has always preferred his name to be all in lower cases. Don’t know why. And I bold his name cus he’s my fave :*

*Those who prefer fast 'rockish' ones check this out Kurenai - The Last Live 1997

All credits go to http://www.furinkan.com/tomobiki/wagaku/artists/x and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/X_Japan

First Attempt :)

2008-10-09T15:08:00.000-07:00

Something to share :)

This happened today, two years ago...

I woke up this morning late, after being forced by my six year old sister [it was as if her duty to wake me up these days] feeling very very awkward, [don’t ask me why] and do stuff… By evening I was bored and just sat there in front of the telly, fixing my eyes on it while my mind were just off somewhere…

My sister came in suddenly, asked if she could go out playing [since my parents weren’t around I was in charged]. I said no for no reason. Heh. Then I smiled and told her off to go out but asked her to come back in when the first rain drop falls. She quickly nodded but remained seated. Obviously, she was focused on that “Gatsby” commercial. Mind you, that’s one hell of a commercial. Hilarious.

So, all of a sudden she looked at me with that sweet smile of her and said I LOVE YOU for no reason. I mean really, I’m close with her but we often fought each other you know like…I always force her to wash her own dishes or to clean her own room wit her sismate, no lunch without changing the kindergarten uniform first. I can be really tough sometimes. And she’s like this ‘horrible-always talk back-not afraid to do grown up stuff-with sheer determination of messing the house’ kind of attitude, though she can be adorable at times…
So back to the story, I eventually asked her why and she said, “Sebab K.Long suke wat Syita geram…” and I’m like, what was that suppose to mean?

However, I just asked her back, “Em, kalo ade org sakitkan ati K.Long Syita nak watpe?” She paused a while…and continue,“Syita bg ubatla!” I laughed for a while..obviously this kid knew a way of answering back. So, I held my hands out and asked, “mane ubatnye…” By that time, it was her turn to gag. She came up close to me and said, “Ni!” and kissed me swiftly on the cheek and ran out to play, laughing…

Whoah~

I mean…I was stunned…

I knew then, that sometimes people who you mind…they just don’t matter, and that people who matter to you…don’t really mind who you are. They’re just..there…

Here's to life!

PS: So what makes YOUR heart smile today?